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  • Writer's pictureRenese

I'm Officially in Quarantine

Ok, So...I'm in the 14-day quarantine bubble because my boyfriend works on the same floor as Rick Cotton, the Head of the NY/NJ Port Authority.

'Cus Rick has the Rona.

And because of the knowns and mostly unknowns of this virus, our respective doctors declared that he and I, too, need to be in isolation just in case.

So, isolation...been in in it before? Because,'s f-cking terrible.

But there are some upsides that I didn't realize until this very experience. So, here are some great things and not-so-great things about being quarantined - #QuarantineLife.

Great thing -

1. Online Grocery Shopping

Got Amazon Prime? Then, you, ma'am, are in a lucky boat with me because Whole Foods delivers if you have a Prime membership.

Blueberries, kombucha, turmeric, and water...they can deliver it all to you without you having to deal with crowds and wearing a mask.

Not-So-Great Thing -

2. All of The Toilet Paper is Gone

If you want Whole Foods to deliver toilet paper, then you might be out of luck. People are planning on dropping record amounts of poop in two weeks, so give yourself a better gift of wiping your arse - baby wipes. That's the more civilized way anyway.

Great Thing -

3. A Dream Come True for Introverts

Isolation is a long-awaited blessing for introverts, so congratulations to you all.

Not-So-Great Thing

4. We Extroverts are Struggling

We are struggling against going stir crazy. Sitting inside my house for days on end is not good for me. Of course, I go outside for fresh air, but then I immediately return to my home because of, ya know, quarantine stipulations and all. And I have 10 more days to go. Oy vey!

Great Thing - And Perhaps, the Greatest Thing. Actually, This is The Greatest Thing

5. You Don't Have To Deal with Work Shenanigans in The Flesh

Let me tell you how good God is. If the Lord is bringing you through a desert at work, then a quarantine doctor's note is a blessing. You might have to still deal with shenanigans through email, but at least you don't have to see the devil in person.

Seriously, though, stay safe and be well all! We will all get through this together 'cus we're 'Mericans, dammit!

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